Misplaced Words
by isaacswolfsbane
Summary: Sirius has a plan, and that plan is to drag Remus to a party to act as his wingman while he hits on Marlene. But it's Sirius, so obviously that isn't the way it goes down. For Ami (AlwaysPadfoot).


For the wonderful Ami! Happy Birthday :D

Thanks to Bex for betaing for me :3

* * *

 **Misplaced Words**

"Moony, what are you wearing tomorrow?" Sirius shouts through Remus' open bedroom door, trying not to drop the mug of butterbeer and two plates of food he's precariously carrying through to the living room (silently cursing the fact that he left his wand in his robe that's hung up by the door).

"How would I know?" he asks as he appears around the doorframe. His eyes go wide at the sight of Sirius' struggle with their food, but Sirius steps back before Remus can take anything from him. "You're going to James', aren't you? I'll have the place to myself so probably pyjamas."

Sirius shakes his head as he carefully makes his way to the living room and flops onto the sofa after putting the food down (which is also on the sofa so it's within arms' reach). "So you're not coming to the party? It's Lily's birthday, and it's a Saturday night—what could you possibly have to do that's better than a party?"

"I have a book to read," Remus says with a shrug before leaning over the back of the sofa to snatch up a few chips from Sirius' plate. "You know, it wouldn't harm you to cook a vegetable every now and then."

"No changing the subject!" Sirius yells, shooting a glare at Remus. "I need you there; you need to be my wingman because James is going to be too busy trying to make Lily happy and Peter's useless at being subtle."

Remus sighs. "Mate, you're going to spend the whole night pining after Marlene—who isn't going to change her mind on you—James and Lily are so loved up they probably won't even know anybody else is there, and Peter's going to spend the night trying to impress the other guests. I'd just end up in the corner with the cat, reading my book, so I might as well do that at home where I can wear my pyjamas and have constant access to tea."

"So you're telling me that books and tea are more important than Lily's birthday?"

"No, but they're better than feeling out of place at a party I don't want to be at."

Sirius can't stop the groan that escapes his mouth. "Please, mate. You never come out and a friend's birthday is a night everyone should be together."

"I'll think about it," Remus says.

He leans over the back of the sofa, snatches up a few more of Sirius' chips, and then heads back to his own room before Sirius can try and persuade him further.

"I'm wearing white," Sirius calls after him. "Just make sure whatever you wear doesn't clash with me!"

Remus shakes his head as the words reach him. Nothing clashes with white. Sirius knows that.

"Prat," Remus mutters to himself as he closes his bedroom door.

* * *

"Honey, I'm home!" Sirius shouts as he slams the front door shut behind him.

Remus' head appears around his bedroom door at the end of the hall. "I told you to stop doing that!" he snaps. "Merlin knows why I showed you those Muggle films. I should have known you'd latch onto anything you could make a joke out of and not let go."

Sirius lets out a deep, hearty laugh that Remus isn't expecting—he wasn't that funny.

"Alas, you were foolish in your pursuit to share Muggle knowledge and now you must deal with the consequences."

It's only then that Sirius realises what Remus is wearing—blue jeans, a light grey shirt, and his favourite cardigan.

"Moony, you're wearing real clothes! Are you coming tonight, then?"

Remus sighs, but plasters a weak smile on his face. "You were right," he says through gritted teeth, hating to admit it in fear of Sirius never letting it go. "Birthdays are a time to be with the people who love you, so I need to be there for Lily. I'm not being your wingman, though."

Sirius' face, which had lit up when Remus said he was right, falls into a false frown.

"But Moony, how on earth will I gather the courage to talk to Marlene without your help?"

"You'll find a way," Remus says, before slamming the door and hiding back in his bedroom.

He's always hated it when Sirius gets this way, but it feels more personal this time. Of course, Remus knows it isn't and that he's thinking irrationally, but considering how much energy and courage he's had to muster to face going to a party, he can't help but feel that it's a personal attack.

* * *

Remus and Sirius Apparate straight into the hallway of James and Lily's house in Godric's Hollow—the two of them had been added into the wards almost as soon as James and Lily bought the place. Almost the second Remus steadies himself, he hears a playful shriek from the kitchen alerting him to the whereabouts of Lily (and probably James, too, unless Lily had tripped over the cat again).

Sirius is already in the kitchen, leaning on the counter as if he has no cares in the world, when Remus enters the room. Remus isn't sure how Sirius got there before him, but he reckons it probably has something to do with the fact that he doesn't have to ready himself to face a big group of people. His eyes scan the room until they fall on Lily's slight figure.

"Happy birthday, Lils," he says, bending slightly to give her a hug.

"Remus!" she exclaims. "You made it. I thought you had other obligations."

Remus sighs and plasters on a smile. "I moved some things around in my calendar," he says. "Sirius made me realise that birthdays are a time you should celebrate with everyone, so I thought it was important I came."

Lily laughs. "You mean, Sirius played on your need to be there for people so he could drag you along to help him hit on Marly?"

"Something along those lines," Remus admits with a sheepish smile. "Quite a party James has thrown," he notes. His eyes scan the room once more, this time taking note of the decorations which cover every inch of the wall, the party hats nobody other than James seems pleased to be wearing, and the biggest cake Remus thinks he's ever seen in his life.

"Isn't it! I feel like a princess," she tells him. "But that doesn't mean I don't have time for my loyal subjects." She loses her playful tone when she adds, "If it gets too much, come and find me. I know you don't do well in these situations."

Remus' smile is genuine this time as he says, "Thanks, Lily, but don't worry about me. You enjoy your birthday."

* * *

Sirius is lying on his back in the middle of the garden, his eyes trained on the sky searching for the stars his family are named after—his was incredibly easy to spot, after all—when a voice breaks his focus, reminding him of his surroundings and the party that was still happening mere feet away from where he lay.

"Aren't you too old to be counting stars?"

He sits up and turns to face the speaker, eyes scanning her body and lingering on the perfectly filled, bright red lips of Marlene McKinnon as she blows out a puff of smoke.

"Godric's Hollow is the only place I get to see them," he says with a shrug. It wasn't a lie, either. Sirius had always loved watching the stars, but the apartment he shared with Remus had little outside space, and even then he couldn't see the stars for how bright the city was. Visiting Lily and James in their little village was the only time he could truly take in the wonders of the night sky.

"Cigarette?" she offers, holding the packet out to Sirius.

"No thanks, I've quit."

Marlene's mouth drops open in shock. "Sirius Black, are you actually taking care of your health? I didn't think I'd live to see the day."

"I was perfectly happy killing myself, but then you asked me to try and, well, I guess it sparked something inside me and I got my life in order." He shrugs again and turns his face back to the sky.

A moment later, Sirius feels the air move as Marlene sits beside him.

"So which one are you named after?" she asks.

A shiver runs down Sirius's spine and he goes very still, his body pulsing with energy that he has to reign in. He can smell the fragrance she's wearing, almost taste it in the air, and she's so close that he can feel her body heat. It takes everything he has not to act on his impulses and kiss her, but it took him long enough to get to the uneasy friendship they share, and Sirius doesn't want to risk blowing that by forcing himself on her.

"Are you flirting with me?" he asks, making note of the somewhat mischievous glint in her eye.

"You wish," she says with a laugh. "I'm just curious if you know, that's all."

"Of course I know!" he says defensively. "I'm the brightest star in the sky, kind of like how I was the brightest student at Hogwarts." He winks at her and there's a moment of silence before they simultaneously burst into laughter.

"I hope you don't mean that academically, Black. You never managed to beat me on a test."

Sirius is about to reply with something witty, but the retort dies on his lips as a few droplets of rain fall on his upturned face.

"We should head back in," he says, nudging Marlene before getting to his feet. "It's supposed to—"

He's cut off by a nearby clap of thunder which is followed by a small, unwanted shriek escaping from Marlene's mouth.

"Start thundering soon…" he mutters, letting the words trail off.

* * *

Inside, the party is still in full swing. Sirius spots Remus in a corner with the cat (as predicted) and nursing a glass of butterbeer, Lily in a deep conversation with Alice, and James rushing around the guests trying to gather them all in one place. To his left, Sirius spots a table of glasses of butterbeer and saunters over, grabbing a glass for himself and another for Marlene.

"I think James is trying to get everyone together to sing Happy Birthday to Lily," he tells Marlene as he gives her the glass. "We should probably head over and save him a job."

The two of them walk over to the kitchen table where Lily's cake is now covered in twenty white candles—Sirius assumes James picked white to contrast with the black icing, or if he didn't, he thinks what a lucky coincidence it is.

"So what's your problem, Marlene?" Sirius asks bluntly. He had considered dancing around the subject and trying to win Marlene over bit by bit, but as that strategy has a one hundred percent failure rate, Sirius decides that getting to the point is the only option left.

"Excuse me?" she asks.

The look of utter confusion on Marlene's face tells Sirius that she probably wasn't thinking the same as him and he needs to provide a better explanation.

"I'm awesome," he tells her. "I can dance like an angel, fight like a cornered bear, plan better than a fox, sing like a nightingale… well, the list goes on. Why wouldn't you want to go on a date with me?"

A laugh escapes from Marlene's mouth that she quickly tries to cover up. "I can't tell if that was sarcasm or if you were being serious—I've seen you dance and I wouldn't exactly put that on the same level as an angel."

"Well, I think so," he says, forcing his lips out into a pout.

Marlene sighs. "Look, do you want to know why I've stopped dating? Why I've stopped going out to bars to try and find 'the one'? Because there are always men like you, that's why."

Sirius' eyes widen in shock. "What? You stopped dating because of me?"

"I said because of men _like_ you. You're all the same; you dance around the issue and then get offended when women don't drop everything to be at your beck and call. I'm sick of it. I want a man who will respect me and treat me right. Do you really think you're that guy?"

"You know, you're pretty sexy when you get angry," Sirius says.

He instantly regrets his words when Marlene slams her empty Butterbeer glass down onto the table and storms off just as the guests start singing.

* * *

Remus is surprised when Sirius joins him in the corner later that night. He had assumed that Sirius would race after Marlene when she stormed off, but as Remus watches his best friend take the seat next to him, he's proven very wrong. He's also certain that something more pressing than just pissing a girl off is weighing on Sirius' mind, but he doesn't know how to approach the subject—normally, Remus would have no issue, but he's never been very good with talking to Sirius about personal problems in a serious manner. Luckily, Remus didn't have to try.

"I just don't know what I'm doing wrong," Sirius says, then quickly amending his words adds, "Well, actually, I do. I just don't know how to do it right and Merlin help me I want to."

Sirius picks up the clock standing on the small table between them, and before Remus can react, throws it across the room.

"Why can't I just get it right?"

"Reparo," Remus says, flicking his wand at the broken clock.

Sirius starts reaching for his discarded Butterbeer glass but Remus quickly moves anything breakable out of the way.

"Sirius, stop. You're going to cause a scene and Lily doesn't need that." Remus sighs. "Let's just go home."

"No, you don't have to. I don't want to ruin your night."

Remus lets out a shallow laugh. "I didn't want to come in the first place, any chance to escape is welcome."

* * *

They Floo home, Remus doesn't think Sirius is stable enough to Apparate home without Splinching. It is only when they step out of the fireplace that Remus notices Sirius is holding the clock from James and Lily's and muttering something about time.

"Speak up, Padfoot. Nobody will be able to hear you muttering like that."

"Marlene always can," he says with a sigh. "I just hate time. It took me too much time to realise Marlene was the perfect woman for me, and now I've gone and blown in it a matter of seconds with a few misplaced words. I just don't know why she won't go on a date with me. She hasn't even considered it."

 _She has,_ Remus thinks to himself, but he chooses not to say anything. Instead, Remus ushers Sirius into his bedroom.

"You know," Remus says as Sirius starts taking off his clothes, not seeming to care that Remus is still in the room, "Most people want to be asked before they'll go on a date with someone."

The words don't register with Sirius immediately. It's not until Remus has left and Sirius is staring up at the glow in the dark stars on his bedroom ceiling that he understands what they mean. As he drifts off to sleep, the last thought going through his head is of Marlene, and what he hopes her reaction will be when he asks her on a date in the morning.

* * *

 **Word Count:** 2,581.

* * *

 **This is for;**

 _ **GGE 2018 January – AlwaysPadfoot;**_

 _Sirius/Marlene, James/Lily, Marauders, smoking, fireplace, thunder and lightning._

 _ **Hogwarts Assignment 7 – Arithmancy;**_

 _Task 4 – write about somebody socially awkward being convinced to attend a party._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Ami's Audio Admirations;  
**_ _Don't Joke About the Full Moon – Remus Lupin._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Sophie's Shelf;  
**_ _Hardboiled Detective – Write about someone doing something they really don't want to do._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Television Show of the Month;  
**_ _Chris Miles – (character) Sirius Black, (colour) white, (dialogue) "I was perfectly happy trying to kill myself but then you asked me to try."_

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Book Club;  
**_ _Mister Nancy – (action) smoking, (dialogue) "I can dance like an angel, fight like a cornered bear, plan better than a fox, sing like a nightingale", (word) sarcasm._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Showtime;  
**_ _Long Sunday Afternoon/My Friend – set a fic on the weekend._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Count Your Buttons;  
**_ _(dialogue) "I think so", (word) respect._

 _ **Hogwarts Writing Club – Lo's Lowdown;  
**_ " _There are always men like you."_

 _ **Hogwarts Yearly Event – Insane House Challenge;  
**_ _162 – (location) Godric's Hollow._

 _ **Hogwarts Yearly Event – 365 Prompts;  
**_ _184 – (setting) Godric's Hollow._

 _ **Hogwarts Yearly Event – Fanfiction Resolutions;  
**_ _26\. Write about someone who dies in the first wizarding war  
69\. Write a gift fic for a Gryffindor_

 _ **Hogwarts April Event – Auction;  
**_ _(food) Butterbeer._

 _ **Hogwarts Easter Event – Easter Basket;  
**_ _Plain Basket/Box – Write about a gathering._

 _ **Hogwarts Easter Event – Guess the Name;**_ _  
Rock – (setting) Godric's Hollow._

 _ **Hogwarts Easter Event – Easter Bingo;  
**_ _1\. (word) problem_

 _ **Hogwarts Film Festival – The Breakfast Club;  
**_ _(day) Saturday, (dialogue) "You're pretty sexy when you get angry"_

 _ **Hogwarts April Club – Gobstones;  
**_ _Orange Stone – Celebration  
(object) clock, (dialogue) "I'm awesome", (word) shiver._

 _ **Hogwarts April Scavenger Hunt;  
** Write a fic about a non-canon Marauder era pairing or triad — Wolfstar excluded_


End file.
